Open letter to Guru Jara
With all due respect I address the spiritual leader of the Love and Nirvana Sanctuary, Guru Jara, as well as his disciples and the global conscious community.
Now, we live in a world where Information is as accessible as never before, a huge part of the western world has the opportunity to travel almost anywhere they want. Many go and study different teachings all across the globe, collecting extraordinary experiences and impressions – but not everyone can call themselves a Guru. Organising their own teachings in a monastery and presenting oneself as a teacher in the spiritual world carries a big responsibility should be taken with the utmost reflection and care. People come in extremely vulnerable states looking for something to support them on their quest to an abundant live and preaching relieve and rising, organising ones own experience and knowledge into a teaching, sect or even ashram comes with an incredible amount of responsibility to care for anyone who decides to surrender themselves to the place or philosophy. With the trend for spiritual lifestyle rising quickly and the state of the world changing into a big need for unsystematic support, many ‘spiritual guides’ exploit the lost people of the modern western world for money and support to lift themselves on a pedestal of knowledge, but also, they rob people looking for support of their time and energy to keep feed their ego or out of ignorance.
My experience in Guru Jaras Sanctuary was interesting at first and became more and more unsafe. The secluded ashram seems to be run by people following something they don’t understand without reference experiences to see their deception. They give their whole days to support others on their journey to an aware state of mind but are lacking true awareness themselves like I would not have thought possible after, 6 months to 5 years of dedicated spiritual life. Striking is, first of all that the disciples are mostly female and exclusively from the limited Czech and Japanese community, though the community seems to include several hundred members there is barely any public information on the philosophy and operations of the place. The organisational leader, who has been in the ashram since 25 years of age, was the least present person I encountered in my time there, hectically walking around the grounds while typing in her phone, mixing up information from which she drew practice recommendations and mistreating the only male monk supposedly due to his gender.
I want to share the most profound observations, that made me decide that my own spiritual path would be deeper and saver continued elsewhere, not to spread negativity but clearly state the happenings to draw awareness and give inspiration for growth for these devoted nouns and monks and the whole community.
For reference, I found my way inside the otherwise quite closed Czech- Japanese – community, through a public call for support for one of their retreats. I was enthusiastically invited to join on regular volunteering terms for any retreat place and stayed 3 weeks during and in between retreats. I was not given any information about the demands or philosophies of the sanctuary and restrictions based on their way of doing things came gradually and without understandable explanation from the 10th day of my stay. While no one ever even told me about their Guru or overall philosophy I was included into almost all rites and practices. Questioning their demands on clothing the longest full time member first lectured “you know because of [the male monk] we should dress modest, not to give him distraction” and gave other unsatisfying reasons like “that’s how they do it in other ashrams” or “to protect the energy”, also the lady in charge of operations trembled through similar reasons and finally told me she would not be able to properly explain I should ask the second spiritual leader (a woman living part time in the sanctuary herself), to whom I did not get any opportunity to speak. While I arrived in quite a calm, grounded energy I could soon observe my steps getting more hectic and injuring myself more frequently. Three out of the four nouns living there were always moving running around, sometimes pushing past me on the paths of the sanctuary, to get to the next job. First slight anger I felt, when I was putting myself in silence for the day before the ritual on full moon day but the lady who had spend over five years in the ashram proceeded to talk to me whilst in the shower and the operational leader through instructions to pass on information at me, hence zero awareness of the practice I was doing. Another basic of the aware life I found to be handled very unsupportive was the food situation. My dietary needs not to consume eggs were repeatedly forgotten and generally the choice of food was mainly determent by the available funds and the planetary days. Almost daily it was part of conversation, that we eat like that because there is no money serving a quite unbalanced, unhealthy diet with lowest quality rice “that is for the dogs” at times. But then during retreat times variety and size of portions went up oddly, serving meat and animal products daily and even shortly before deep practices like breath work.
My antennas really went up when I was told that the sanctuary schedule was particularly designed not to give room to think. In the interview it had not been mentioned, that I was expected to follow the full 17 hrs schedule and not to leave the grounds in any recces time I had. Soon felt like there was a big element of controlling any space for inner reflection. Not just was the schedule particularly designed not to give room the think for yourself but also it was subject to short term changes and information on specific program was often given only at the event itself so that a full availability with no predictability was the norm and specifically wanted. This is clearly not supportive for the inner journey but only creates subordination and the need for full devotion to the system paired with the lack of giving information about the practices and way of doing things it quickly becomes quite a dangerous mix for blind submission. Surely, if the system would be thoroughly tested and would promote safety and growth for the individual one could argue that full devotion can be contributory to spiritual awakening. In the community following Guru Jara I have experienced neither guidance or safety concerns, being unguidedly dumped into deep rituals and practices, and not getting any open contact with anyone in charge until my very last hours. I saw a noun break under the unguided workload which was “normal for her every few weeks”, being the hardest worker pushing through with sugared rice after every meal. At last, I was asked to stay one more day for proper closing of my time there, where I received nothing but a shared tuk-tuk ride with the second spiritual leader where we had superficial conversation while she was organising thing or her phone and with the other present people.
As for the teachings I experienced while I was there, I observed that influences from different paths have been reinvented into an ungraspable mix of practices. Especially the teachings and practice with dark energy chakras in our legs should be deeply reconsidered, without having the chance to properly grasp the concept they were working with I was part of a few programs expected to follow and participate. Finally, I was part of a deep breath work practice, without information about the evening program I was being served a big, non-veg meal only one hour before and not given proper guidance into the breathing pattern. I found myself with a paining stomach in a breath pattern I did not know was intended here. This last experience showed me clearly how uniformed and unconscious things were practiced here; my boundaries were far overstepped. I had decided with a light heart the morning before, that I was to move on from this place to follow spiritual exploration in a safer and more fruitful way. Then I exploded in anger during the practice when I was told to ask Guru Jara (about whom I had not received any information until now and only gradually found out that there was a certain spiritual leader in place) for guidance. “you fucking bastard” I screamed at him in my conscious, feeling anger that is otherwise unknown to me “you can not let unconscious people guide vulnerable persons in such deep practices, it is your responsibility. They are taking the spiritual practice lightly and it is your job to keep everyone here safe”.
So dear Jara, I do not know you personally and I am sorry for how I talked to you in my conscious, but even though this is not my preferred way of communication I stand to everything I felt there. As much love as I have for every person I shared my time and presence with and I think they are all wonderful human beings, your nouns in the Philippines are living an unconscious life filled with a mindset of scarcity and blind devotion. I am not to judge your level of awakening or the depth of your journey, but I do want to call you to take responsibility how your teachings are being used and shared with seekers in your places.
